


Toy Soldier

by Deans_Fetish



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Dubious Consent, Season 4 Spoilers (sort of), Slightly Dean POV, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-05-23
Updated: 2009-05-23
Packaged: 2018-09-18 21:01:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9402719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deans_Fetish/pseuds/Deans_Fetish
Summary: ~And it is written, the first demon shall be the last seal.~ Lilith is dead, Lucifer is rising, Sam and Dean are running, but there's one more thing Sam must do before everything can be set to rights between the brothers, and Castiel is going to help him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was inspired to write this not only by the song, but by what happened at the Aussie AHBL Convention with Misha and Jared playing around and Jensen looking all shocked and upset about it.
> 
> **"Step by step, heart to heart, left, right, left, we all fall down, like Toy Soldiers..."** ~ by, Martika

And there I stand, next to my brother, my lover that I haven't touched since I've been back from hell, the best-friend I ever had, the one who has always meant the wold to me, as we watch the bright light in the floor grow bigger, brighter. 

Ruby's dead body laying at our feet, and damn, I gotta say that makes me exceedingly happy, even with Hell on earth a blink away, I can't help but feel a sense of satisfaction in at least knowing that together we killed that evil bitch. The little cunt who wedged her way in between my Sammy and me. If we had more time and things weren't so totally fucked right now, I think I might just spit on her dead shell, but, there's no time for that now. 

I look over at Sammy as I hear his awed, "He's coming!" and I can't help the look that crosses my face, somewhere between, 'No shit!?' and 'Are you crazy!?', but I don't say either one, we don't have time for snarky smart ass remarks either, and damn that's just a dirty shame, because I got a million of 'em swimmin' around in my head right now. 

I start to tear my gaze away from him, but instead it falls to his lips and I find myself staring before I blink and remind myself that we don't have time for _that_ either. Fuckin' Lucifer, anyway! [huffs under breath] 

I manage to totally tear my gaze away from him to look over at the growing shot of light shooting up out of the floor, growing wider and wider, getting brighter and brighter, and somewhere in my head I wonder about that, cause isn't Lucifer a bad guy? But then, in the next breath, I can almost hear Castiel telling me that Lucifer is a fallen _Angel_ and it makes a twisted kind of logic. ...sort of.

"Come on, Sammy!" I tug on his jacket, as we're both gripping each other's like one of us might just vanish if we don't hold on tight, if we don't touch the other might not be real. So, I'm tugging on him, but he's frozen in his spot, just staring, his slightly slanted eyes wider than I think I've ever seen them as he watches the light and I have this urge to just sucker punch him and toss his huge ass over my shoulder, but knowing my luck he wouldn't pick up those long ass legs of his and we'd be nothing more than a comedy team as I trip over them while running and we'd both crumble to the ground. 

So instead, I clench my jaw and give him my best 'Dad' look. "Sam! Come. on. !" I bark the order at him, just like Dad would, commanding, without room for any argument or thought from his 'little soldier', just obedience, like he always expected, wanted, demanded from us, from me.

That's when Sam finally drags his gaze away from the light bursting out of the floor and looks at me like he's surprised to see me standing there or somethin'. 

"Come on, Sam, we gotta run!" I nearly growl at him, tugging on his jacket. I watch as he nods, and then we're running, running toward the double wooden doors, just as the entire place starts to shake like it's gonna crumble to the ground, fall down to the foundation or something.  
Bits and pieces of rock, marble and brick are falling around us as we run and we're almost out when my grip on Sam's jacket is torn from me and I look over with wide eyes wondering what the hell _now_!?

That's when I see Castiel standing there, he has Sam's back pressed up against a wall, an arm at his throat, holding him there, and Cas's face is that same blank ass look that he always has so I haven't got a fuckin clue what the hell he's thinkin'.

"Cas! What the hell? We gotta get outta here! Let him go! Leave him alone!" I yell at the angel.

Castiel looks from Sam to me and shakes his head, just once, but it was definitely a shake and he's doing that 'busted' face again like he did before, earlier when he was acting like Heaven's whipped puppy.

"Cas!" I nearly roar at him, getting pissed as I take a step toward him, even as the building shakes and more of the roof falls down around us.

Castiel looks at me and tilts his head slightly in that way he does like he is trying to figure me out, like I'm not making any sense to him. Which only makes me grit my teeth because all I can wonder is if he's totally brain dead... what the hell is there to figure out!?... the place is falling apart, Lucifer is rising - he and ole Lu might be _family_ and it might not be freakin' him the hell out, - but me and Sammy....? We need to run the hell out of here! Simple, cut and dry, didn't think his ass needed a guide map and compass for this one. 

"Go, Dean. You can't help your brother," he looks back at Sam, his gaze searching Sam's face as Sam stands there looking at him, muscle twitching in his jaw. He's got that stubborn look on his face, but I can see the fear behind it, cause Sam knows he fucked up and now he's got an angel pinning him to the wall and it ain't lookin' too damn pretty.

I cross the distance separating me from Castiel and grip his shoulder, turning him around, but the arm against Sam doesn't even budge as he turns to look at me. "What the hell do you mean, I can't save my brother!? He's saved!" I glance at Sam, then look back at Castiel, "He's fine! Leave him alone!"

Castiel shakes his head at me, again, it's one of those slow almost non-existent shakes, but I caught it. "That's... not entirely true," he tells me. 

Okay now I'm ready to punch him again, but I remember the last time, or at least my hand does, so instead my hands clench and unclench into fists at my sides. "Spill it, Cas! We don't have time for your Angelic double talk! What the hell are you talking about!?"

Castiel takes a deep breath as he looks back at Sam and tilts his head, "Do you remember what I told you, Dean? That to kill Lilith Sam would need to drink enough demon blood that he would become that which you would feel compelled to hunt?"

I glance at Sam and see the look of devastation that flashes across his face before he bites it back, hides it, tucks it away, but again, like the Angel before me, I saw it. (And people say _I_ hide away shit! [huffs].) 

Looking back at Castiel I nod once, "Yeah, I remember." I tell him, forcing myself not to look at Sam as I say it, or after. 

Castiel sighs, finally looking over at me as he tears his gaze away from Sam. "That's where we are, Dean. You can't help your brother," he tell me before looking back at him, "but I can," he says.

I look at him, my eyes widening slightly, and glancing at Sam, I see he's got a mirror look on his face of my own. 

Looking back at the Angel, I narrow my eyes, "And just how exactly do you do that?" I ask him.

Castiel looks over at me, "Does it matter? Just rest in the knowledge that he will be as you remember him when he leaves this place."

Chunks of the structure have been continuing to fall as we stood talking, yeah, okay, arguing. I lick my lips, glancing up as another rather nasty quake shakes the foundations. "I don't think you have time for much of anything here, Cas."

"Go Dean." Castiel tells me again, not replying to my comment.

With a glance at Sam, I look back at Castiel and huff, stepping closer to him, "If you hurt him..."

Castiel tilts his head as he looks at me, "Have faith.... in me." 

I swallow and glance again at Sam, feeling like shit that I am about to do this, but what choice to I have? The longer I stand there and argue with Cas the more of the damn building is falling down around us and it sure as hell doesn't look like he's gonna let Sam out before he does whatever the hell it is he has in his twisted little Angel brain. 

I see Sam struggle against Cas's hold a little as I take a step back and I look shake my head, "It's okay, Sammy. I'll... I'll see you out side." I tell him before turning and running toward the door, feeling like a fucking traitor. I hate it, but... but it's Cas, so, I run, I go against everything I ever believed before and try to hold on to the fact that Cas was there when no other fuckin' angel or whatever the hell else, would help, he was there, he did. So, I run for the door, even as I wonder, hope and pray that I'm doing the right thing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ~And it is written, the first demon shall be the last seal.~ Lilith is dead, Lucifer is rising, Sam and Dean are running, but there's one more thing Sam must do before everything can be set to rights between the brothers, and Castiel is going to help him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was inspired to write this not only by the song, but by what happened at the Aussie AHBL Convention with Misha and Jared playing around and Jensen looking all shocked and upset about it.
> 
>  **"Step by step, heart to heart, left, right, left, we all fall down, like Toy Soldiers..."** ~ by, Martika

Castiel waited, his gaze intent on Sam's face, until he knew Dean was out of the monastery. It was then that he let the knife slide down the sleeve of his trench, catching the hilt in his hand and raised it.

Sam swallowed hard, slightly slanted hazel eyes on the blade before him. "Where did you --" he licked his lips, shifting his weight as he took in a breath of air through his nose and looked back at Castiel, "Dean... you took it off Dean?"

Castiel's blue gaze slid to the knife before he shrugged a shoulder, "Humans... are easily distracted." 

Sam's eyes went to the blade once more, before returning to the Angel, "So, you're gonna kill me? You think that's gonna go over real good with your buddy there?" he huffed, "I think Dean'll kick your ass for it."

Castiel tilted his head, "Where was this unwavering belief in your brother when you needed it, Sam?" he slowly looked away from him then, to the knife in his hand, then back to Sam. 

Sam clenched his jaw, muscle twitching, not answering the Angel. "So, do it." Sam told him, voice soft, eyes narrowed, "Do it, kill me. 

Castiel leaned in, but in stead of the blade sinking in to Sam's flesh, Castiel lowered his hand, his lips slanting over Sam's as he kissed him.

Sam's protest was muffled by the kiss as he struggled against Castiel's hold on him, hands shoving against the Angel's shoulders, trying to push him away, body squirming against the wall. 

More of the roof fell down around them as a strange eerie sound came from the sanctuary. 

Castiel lifted his arm, and slowly waved two fingers, as he held the blade in the other three, making the doors to the sanctuary slam closed. 

Moving quickly, he pulled his lips away from Sam's, and turned him, one arm, the one that had held him pinned against the wall wrapped around Sam's chest, pressing him back against the Angel's vessel.

Sam grit his teeth, struggling in the Angel's hold. "Cas, what the hell are you--?" Sam's sentence faltered as he looked down at the knife, watching as Castiel raised it, wrapping that arm around him to join the first, the sharp blade, slicing quickly through the tender flesh of the Angel's arm.

As Castiel's blood, Angel blood, ran freely down his arm, Castiel heard Sam's gasp, felt his body tense. "Drink it." Castiel ground out, lifting his arm higher for Sam to take.

Sam's eyes seemed to glaze over as he looked down at Castiel's bleeding arm, the want, the need to drink tearing a groan from his lips.   
At Castiel's command, Sam reached for his arm, bringing it to his lips. Sam fastened his mouth over the wound and drank deeply, just like he use to Ruby's blood, demon blood, only now it was Castiel's blood, Angel blood. 

Where Ruby's blood was tangy, like hot sauce on his tongue, Castiel's sent a warm through him, like hot cocoa on a winters day, thick and sweet like syrup. A soft moan tore from Sam's throat as he drank, his body responding like it always did when he drank from Ruby, only this time, it wasn't Ruby, it was Castiel. But, his addiction fogged brain didn't care. 

Castiel's free hand went to the button of Sam's jeans, unfastening it and lowering the zipper as he allowed Sam to feast on his blood. His hand dipping inside the denim, under the cotton of his boxers to wrap his hand around Sam's length, slowly moving his hand on him, caressing, pumping him.

A deep moan tore from Sam's throat as he drank, his hips slowly moving to the rhythm of Castiel's stoking his cock, his hands clasping Castiel's arm gripped tighter, eyes squeezed tightly closed as his body responded to the Angel's touch, his shaft growing impossibly harder in Castiel's hand, pulsing and throbbing.

Castiel pressed himself against Sam, his groin against Sam's ass, grinding and thrusting, building friction as his hand on Sam's cock quickened it's pace, squeezing him just right as his hand moved along his length, thumb ghosting over the tip, smearing the drop of precum around on the blunt tip. Sam's body shuddered as a moan tore from his throat. 

"That's it, Sam. Drink, allow it to happen. You're going to be well again. It's alright." Castiel coaxed, soothed, his mouth near Sam's ear, warm breath ghosting over sensitive flesh.

Castiel's hand pulled out from the front of Sam's pants, as he released his cock, Sam giving a whimper of protest. 

"Shhh, trust me, Sam." Castiel told him softly before pressing his lips against the skin behind Sam's ear, hot breath warming the area.

Sam drew in a ragged breath, stagger-stepped forward toward the wall as the floor of the structure shuttered and rumbled around them. 

Castiel started to shove Sam's jeans down, first one side, then the other, until they were at mid-thigh, his hand going to the button and zipper of his vessel's dress slacks then, nimble digits making short work of the fastenings. Shoving the slacks down, Castiel pumped Jimmy's cock in his hand a few times, jaw clenched, his face still set in that same dead-pan stare that showed little to no emotion even as Jimmy's dick thickened and lengthened in his hand. 

Releasing his cock, Castiel reached back around Sam, to grip his thick, hard cock, pumping him hard and fast as he ground his groin against Sam's ass, thrusted against him. 

Sam bit back a moaned whimper, as he stopped drinking for a moment, though his mouth remained locked on the wound on Cas's arm. Sam's hips thrusted his cock into Castiel's fist harder, his breaths panting out through his nose, chest rising and falling with each, until Sam had to release Cas's arm so he could gasp in more air. 

Panting out his breaths, Sam's body tensed. "Cas?" he asked, nervously, hands moving to the wall, laying palms flat against it. 

"Almost over, Sam." Castiel replied, voice devoid of emotion.

Sam tilted his head back, lips parted, Angel blood covering his chin, smeared around his mouth. His eyes fluttered closed as his hips continued to thrust his throbbing cock into the Angel's fist. "Oh God..."

Castiel's jaw clenched, "Not quite." 

Sam frowned slightly at the unexpected reply, but then Castiel's hand was gone from his cock and he was too busy whimpering, thrusting his hips into air as he lowered his head, looking down to see why, what had happened.

Castiel had released Sam's cock to reach back and grab his own leaking erection, pressing the blunt tip up against Sam's tightly puckered hole.

Sam's eyes widened, he shook his head as he tried to turn, to move out of the Angel's one armed grasp, but it was like a steel band holding him in place. "Noooo, Cas! No! I don't want...." Sam struggled, continuing to try to get out of Castiel's grip.

"I didn't ask you, did I, Sam?" Castiel asked him, again that emotionless voice, as he pressed Sam hard up against the wall, making Sam have to turn his head, cheek against the cold stone, body pressed against it's surface. 

The foundation rumbled, one of the pillars nearby fell crashing to the ground near them, but Castiel ignored it as he slowly started to push his cock into Sam.

"No! No! Dean! Dean help!" Sam's hands flailed, fingertips clawing at the cold stone wall, as Castiel, held him locked there with one arm and Angelic power. 

"I told you, your brother can't help you, Sam." Castiel answered, a second before the doors to the front of the monastery slammed closed.

***

I'd run out side, but it sure as hell doesn't mean I was happy about it. I stood there, pacing just outside the doors of the damn monastery, glaring at the building, then up toward Heaven. Uttering threats to a God, I wasn't even sure existed. "If you let him get hurt, I swear to..." (well, now that really didn't work now did it?) "I swear by you that I will find a way up there just to kick your ass!" I yelled at the darkened sky, before returning my glare to the building itself. "Same goes for you, Castiel, Angel of the Lord! You let Sam get hurt and Angel or not, I will kick your ass!" 

I huff then as I pace, and I feel a little bit better having gotten that off my chest. Not because I really think either one of them heard me, but because i just felt good to yell... at something!

I've been out here for a good fifteen minutes now and I don't see what the hell they could be doing in there, inside a crumbling building where Lucifer is rising, for fifteen minutes, so yeah, I'm getting more and more pissed as the seconds tick by.

I'm not even sure I'm completely just mad at Cas, I mean, I was the dumbass who ran out of there when I should have just told him, no. No go, not happening. Sm was coming with me and that was final. What was he gonna do? Take me back to Hell? Might actually be a little safer down there if Hell is suppose to be comin' to earth anyway.

_Sonuva..._

I think I suddenly hear Sam callin' me and I freeze in my steps, listening and that's when the damn doors to the place slam shut. I'm running up to them and trying to pry them open, but they aren't budging, so I'm throwing my shoulder into it, trying to break down the damn door, and still nothin', but I gotta get in there, I could have sworn I heard Sam, and the doors... it _had to_ of been Sam. 

"What the hell are you doin' in there, Cas!?" he scream at the top of my lungs as I glare at the door, before I start kicking at it with all my might.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ~And it is written, the first demon shall be the last seal.~ Lilith is dead, Lucifer is rising, Sam and Dean are running, but there's one more thing Sam must do before everything can be set to rights between the brothers, and Castiel is going to help him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was inspired to write this not only by the song, but by what happened at the Aussie AHBL Convention with Misha and Jared playing around and Jensen looking all shocked and upset about it.
> 
>  **"Step by step, heart to heart, left, right, left, we all fall down, like Toy Soldiers..."** ~ by, Martika

Castiel pushes his hips forward more, causing Sam to squirm harder a growl of protest tearing from his lips. 

"Relax, Sam. You're only going to make it worse, if you don't calm down." Castiel's voice, dark and soft, hot breath ghosting over Sam's ear.

"Fa-fuck you, Cas!" Sam stammers, managing to make it sound angry and hateful, even as his heart is hammering in his chest, his mouth having gone dry. His body keeps telling him to arch back, to take what Castiel is offering, but it just pisses him off more because it isn't Dean, and he only does this with Dean, only Dean. It's special and precious then and this is neither of those things. This is dirty and wrong, another sin on his already mounting list of many and Sam wants no part of it. He knows he's messed up enough, why is Castiel, an Angel trying to damn him further? 

His cock is leaking precum, arching toward his stomach, hard and heavy between his legs, aching for release, but Sam's fighting, he's fighting to ignore it, to not listen to what his body is telling him he needs. 

"Please..." the soft plea falls from Sam's lips as he feels Cas push in a bit further, making Sam's cock twitch. He closes his eyes tight against the truth of it, against the knowledge that he wants this, because he shouldn't. God he shouldn't.

"It will be alright, Sam. You... you lack faith." Castiel mutters softly, making Sam gasp in a breath that sounds like a near sob as his eyes open, looking heavenward, his face a mask of despair, cheek pressed flat against the stone wall.

"W-why?" Sam asked, swallowing hard as he felt Castiel push the rest of the way into him. Sam squeezed his eyes closed as he breathed through the pain of it, the burn. It hurt like hell, no lube, no getting him ready the way that Dean always did, and he's trembling sweat beading his brow.

"I have to, Sam," Castiel told him softly, voice emotionless, "I made a promise... to your brother." 

Sam's eyes snap open, lips parting and it feels like Castiel just ripped his heart out of his chest as he gasps in a breath. Fingers curl into tight fists against the cold stone wall, as a silent tear runs from his eye, down the side of his face, falling from his jawline onto the floor below them. "What?" Sam asks, the word sounding small, so very small in that moment.

Castiel isn't listening, he isn't watching Sam's face, as he wraps his arm back around Sam, taking his cock in hand, stroking him once more, his grip sure and strong as he moves his hand just the right way that makes Sam want to moan, but his bites his lip instead and squeezes his eyes closed. In his head, Sam is still screaming, _What? Why? Why? Why?_ But, his body doesn't care why, he's use to this, use to a good fuck after blood. No, not just use to it, his body craves it like it craves the blood. So when Castiel begins to move inside him, thrusting his cock and hitting Sam's prostate with each stroke, it isn't long before Sam's pushing back against him, taking every thrust and wanting more. Sam's lips are parted, his head tilted back nearly on Castiel's shoulder, breaths panting out and he's using the wall as leverage to push back harder on Cas's cock lodged, oh-so-sweetly, in his ass.

Sam's moaning and groaning now, hips thrusting back and forward, fucking Castiel's fist and grinding his ass back on his cock. Castiel's arm that hand been holding Sam against the wall, slowly pulls away to wrap around him, running up under his tee to caress his chest and abs, pressing him back against him. 

"That's it, Sam. Like that." Castiel tells him, and it still sounds far to broken away and emotionless to be sexy.

Sam doesn't seem care how Cas's voice sounds in that moment, because somehow, his lust fogged brain has added the inflection Castiel's speech lacks and it sounds pretty damn hot to him, making him writhe and moan in his embrace as he answers breathlessly, "Yeah, Cas, yeah, fuck me, fuck me harder."

***

Yeah, it's stupid, but don't you dare laugh or I'll hunt you down and kick your ass too!... [frowns and sighs] I got my ear pressed against the heavy wooden doors like I'm gonna hear somethin' through them.... and then even if I do, like I'm going to suddenly turn Incredible Hulk out here and rip the heavy ass door off or somethin'. [huffs] See? I told ya it was stupid... but I gotta know what the hell's goin' on in there! This shit is drivin' me insane! I mean, they been in there now, what?... nearly a half hour!? What the fuck are they doin' in there for a half hour? And where the fuck is Lu? What did he stop off on his way from Hell to get a chocolate shake and some fries with gravy? [grins slowly] Hey, that sounds kinda good actually....[frowns] NOT RIGHT NOW!! I didn't mean right now! Christ! [huffs and shakes head]

***

Another pillar comes crashing down to the floor near them and suddenly Castiel whips them around, press Sam down over it, his cock still lodged deep in Sam's ass. He starts to fuck into him harder then, making Sam have to press his hands flat on the floor to keep from falling over, the heavy pillar rolling slightly under Sam, pulling him away a little, only to have Castiel pull him back by the hand wrapped tightly around Sam's waist. The hand on Sam's cock never missing a beat, stroking him hard, squeezing him just right. 

"Oh God.... oh God..... fuck! Cas!" Sam cries out, as he rocks back against each thrust, his cock into his fisted hand. Sweat is dripping from Sam's brow onto the floor, running down the bridge of his nose, running from his sideburns down his face. a thin sheen covering his body, making his clothes cling to his form.

Breaths panting out, Sam feels the heat pool low in his belly, his balls drawing up tight. He grits his teeth, squeezing his eyes tightly closed.  
"Cas, I'm gonna... Oh God..." he practically whines, "I'm gonna cum!"

In the next second, Sam's hot spunk is coating the Angel's hand, some dripping down onto the pillar, the floor as he cums hard shouting Castiel's name. 

Sam's slumps over the pillar, boneless and spent when it's over, his breaths panting out from between blood stained lips. Castiel slowly pulls out of Sam, as he groans, Castiel runs pulls his hand up and runs it over Sam's hair as he slowly releases his cock. "Shhh, it's over now, Sam." he tells him softly.

Castiel pulls away, walking across the room to wipe his hand off on something, but Sam's can't see what he's doing, just the movement of his feet on the floor as he watches him through barely open eyes.

Returning, Castiel kneels next to him and places one hand on Sam's back. "We need to go now, your brother is waiting for us, and I've held off Lucifer as long as I can."

Sam sucks in a shocked breath, eyes opening wider as he rolls, quickly pulling up his pants, his boxers, tucking himself back in and fastening them up. A glance at the Angel tells Sam he's already done this, though when he isn't sure.

"You held off Lucifer?" Sam asks him.

Castiel pulls up to his full height and gives a barely there nod. "For a while, but I can't any longer, we need to go."

Sam quickly pulls to his feet, glancing toward the door, then back at Castiel and licks his lips. "Cas, what happened here..."

Castiel turns his head and looks at him, eyes narrowing. "What exactly happened here, Sam?" he asks him.

Sam frowns nearly angrily, hurt, offended. He huffs and runs a hand through his hair, looking around them, before his gaze meets Castiel's unwavering one. Sam shook his head, "I dunno exactly."

Castiel tilted his head to the side, "How do you feel, Sam?"

Sam blinked at the question, opening his mouth only to clamp it closed again. 

Castiel sighed, "Would you like some more blood before we go?"

Sam's stomach rolled at the thought of drinking blood, much the way it did the first time Ruby ever offered it and he shook his head, making a face. Then it hit him., "I - I don't want it anymore...."

Castiel nodded to him. "That is what happened here, Sam. I undid everything that had happened. Took light and poured it into the darkness."

Sam licked his lips, looking down as he nodded, "I -," he looked up at Castiel, "Thank you."

Castiel looked past Sam toward the doors, before looking at him once more, "I made a promise." he told him simply, before stepping past him and walking toward the doors. 

Sam bit his lip, nodding as he watched Castiel walk away. He should have known, Dean always took care of him. Always. 

Castiel stopped and looked back at Sam over his shoulder, "Don't be too upset about your fall, Sam. Even soldiers fall," he told him, face expressionless, before he turned back around and continued toward the door.

Sam hurried after him as another tremor shook the building.

***

So, I'm standing there and nearly fall in as the doors suddenly open wide, Castiel and Sam walking out toward me.

"What the hell kept you two!? What went on in there!?" I yell, looking from one to the other, but neither one are answering me.  
I huff and shake my head at the both of them, before turning to storm off toward my car. I can't believe them! They spend forty-five minutes in there after they send me out and then just stand there like a couple of jackasses when ask them what went on!

I turn around walking backwards and glare at Castiel, "You better not have hurt him!" he tell him, just to make myself feel better, because I didn't really get to have that out with him.

I glance over and see Sam following me, his head is bowed and he looks deep in thought, which knowing my brother can only mean bad things.

When we reach the car I look at Sam from over the roof, I mean really look at him and my eyes narrow.

His clothes are wet from sweat, he's hair looks damp from it, he's got this look on his face, like he's guilty.... yeah, I can see it even though he's looking down. His hair is a mess all over his head, there's blood on his face. I noticed that before, but with Cas and his thing about Sam's demon blood, I figure maybe I know about that... or at least have figured that out. I figure maybe Cas gave him some Angel blood... hell, like Bobby said no one knows how to demon blood detox you, maybe that's how. So, I had let that slide for now, I doubt Cas would have let Sam do any snackin' on Ruby's dead body or anythin', not that it would work anyway. No more demon, he'd of just been doin' the Dracula thing.

As Sam slowly looks up at me, I feel like some one has just slapped me across the face as I look at him. His cheeks are slightly flushed and he has this totally fucked out look about him. I grit my teeth as I look over the car at him. "Did you fuck my Angel!?" I ask him, but I didn't mean it to come out quite like that, it just **did**.

I watch Sam open and close his mouth like a fish out of water and that's the moment that I know, I fucking _know_ , it's true. 

"What the hell is wrong with you, Sam!?" I scream at him, "He's an ANGEL! Doesn't that mean _anything_ to you any more!?"

"He didn't do it, Dean. I did," Castiel said, standing right behind me all of the sudden. I close my eyes, jaw clenched and I swear to GOD, or _whoever_ , I am gonna punch that rat bastard again!

I turn around, my eyes blazing as I look at him, "You mind tellin' me what part of fucking my brother was so important that you had to do it in there," I point back behind us at the monastery that's crumbing down to the foundations now. "as the fucking Apocalypse is starting!?" I scream at him.

"I was..." I watch him glance at Sam, then look back at me, "keeping a promise." he tells me, in that calm emotionless way of his.

"A promise!? To who!?" I spat at him, looking him up and down.

"To you, Dean." he tells me.

It took nearly half the night for them to explain this to me, so that I stop totally freaking out. We ended up leaving the area we were in, Castiel doing that zap touch thing, and all of us finding ourselves in some motel room somewhere, apparently paid for by a guy named Moses Ark.

[huffs and shakes head, eyes closed]

And once I understood what had happened and why, Castiel disappeared, leaving Sam and I there alone. But, I'm not talking to him.  
I said I understood, I never said I was happy about it. I'm sitting at the table, my arms crossed over my chest, just looking at him as he sits on the edge of the bed, his head hanging. 

"This isn't gonna work." I tell him softly, pulling to my feet as I let my arms hang down at my sides and start walking toward him.

I watch as he looks up at me and swallows, but he doesn't say anything, not at first, not until I'm standing directly over him and he has to arch that sinful neck of his to look up at me. 

"What - what do you want me to do, Dean?" he asked me.

I shove him back onto the bed, lowering myself down on top of him, "I want you to forget about him, about Castiel. I want to fuck you until you can't even remember his name, I want to take back what's _mine_ and mine alone. _That's_ what I want, Sammy." I tell him softly, my mouth inches away from his as I gaze into his eyes.

I see him swallow before he nods, "I want that too. I'm - I'm sorry... about everything," he tells me, his eyes shining and in that moment, my heart breaks a little and I can't stay mad at him. 

I nod. "I know, Sammy. I know," I tell him softly, before slanting my mouth over his, kissing him hard, reclaiming what is mine and mine alone. When our lips part, we're both breathing heavy. "Now, I want you to show me how sorry you are. Mine, Sammy, only mine," I tell him and as he nods, my heart that had been broken since Hell, swells, my lips curving into a smile before I kiss him again.


End file.
